Me: Can I use the bathroom? Teacher: I don't know,...
softpliesandhighdemipointes: TEACHER: OTHER STUDENTS IN THE CLASS: AND I’M JUST LIKE : Well done.
70 Year Old Man Stoned to Death for Homosexuality →
Suspect said the Old Testament told him that homosexuals must be stoned WHY? Is stoning to death in the frikking constitution? I myself am a Christian and I loathe this stupidity.
Dad: Call me now or I call police
Happy St. Patricks Day!
How are you guys all finding each other, yet I...
I think you’re clogging up Omegle with people looking for you or people pretending to be you… Which is in a way awesome :D
You are incredibly elusive. I ran into someone who asked if I was you. Of course, I intended for the same thing. I think what you do is awesome though. <3 redmaryjane
Best Hipster Quote Rebuttals
Me: I can’t believe we didn’t actually have a snow day! How could my sources be wrongg?!?!
Mom: Thats what George. W said about WMDs
How official is this? Why does this document have to be written and prepared that way? So you think you’re God’s gift to the world. Show me the money. Love, ~pj
I figured out the ending to INCEPTION.
julieas: So, you know how everyone thinks that the Top is his totem, but in the beginning he mentions that it’s actually Mal’s? Well, you see, if it’s not his totem, then it’s not going to properly work for him. Cobb’s totem is his wedding ring. Whenever he’s dreaming, he has a wedding ring on because, as he says, in his dreams, they’re still together. In reality, he’s not wearing a ring. During...
The Busy Business Busies Made Me Not Do It!
I can’t believe that I let February pass me by without posting anything. I feel shocked and horrified. I feel shocked and horrified, first and foremost, that I haven’t written anything when more than half of what happened to me in February was worth writing down. Secondly, I am shocked and horrified because February was like a WHOLE year. I present to you a short list: A course in...
DAD: Hi. Hope it went well. I seen to have left the house with the foror you need for party. You will have to drop by and get them.any chance when you in out tip afternoon to community centre… You could pick up an order of saint at Colour your World?
ME: I have no idea what you’re talking about. I think that was supposed to go to Mom, not me.
DAD: Sorry. Send back so i can pend to her.
DAD: SEND IT BACK TO ME
DAD: LOVE YOU SO MUCH
DAD: SEND IT